As a child, I really struggled with tact.  I had no idea what that meant, and my parent told me to always tell the truth, so I did.  I didn’t know that people should tell the truth tactfully. I would speak my mind with all the authority that a six-year-old could muster.  It took my mother sitting me down for a long talk to understand exactly what I was doing wrong; this allowed me to change my approach. Instead of simply saying what I thought I add the disclaimer, “no offense but”… This was my way to zing you without really zinging you. When my mother further explained that my new approach was really no different, I struggled to find a way to tread the balance. As I got older it became difficult for me to say what I thought decisively.  I have a really hard time telling people no, in a way that is clear.  This seems to be getting me into trouble lately.  There is a guy who is interested in me.  I have said no, in the best way that I know how and he doesn’t seem to be getting the message. I have the sneaking suspicion that’s because I’m not being forceful enough.  I have no intention of engaging his advances, but that’s not a deterrent for him.  All because of a lesson I learned very early. Be tactful. But is it time for me to give up that pretence?

Today’s Task: Let your no mean no. It can be difficult to say what you mean without being offensive but it’s even more difficult to deal with the fall out of not being clear. If you aren’t able to be tactful try losing a little bit of the tact.  You will always know that your words will be understood and you will lessen the blow of any pain that you may cause someone with your truth. I hope that I will learn to walk the fine line between truth and tact and I hope that my answer will be taken for what they are… Big Fat NOs!